The overlooked skill for every career transition: Holding liminal space. (plus 5 ways to increase your capacity)
Anything I ever did - small or big - came with sitting in the space of in-between. The decision to move to New Zealand to work in an unpaid NGO position without a (paid) job secured? Pivoting to a high-pressure role in international development without direct experience? Starting a new senior role in London with no support network? Pivoting careers mid-life from operational roles to coaching?
All of these were spaces where I didn’t know what or how to do something.
The liminal space.
In the liminal space, everything and nothing is possible at the same time. A transformational shift can happen if we allow it.
Understanding liminal spaces in your career journey
Liminal spaces are everywhere. A hallway corridor is a liminal space. As is an airport. As is a career transition.
The Latin word “limen” means threshold. It’s the physical, emotional and metaphorical space of in-between. A transition of where you’ve been and where you’re going.
If you pay attention, you’ll see how people behave in these liminal spaces. A colleague might rush from meeting to meeting to avoid spending too much time in the corridor. Another colleague might take their time and use the space to think before entering the next room.
All my coaching clients are in liminal spaces in their careers.
My client, W., is building her freelance business and is about to leave her full-time job with a UN agency to pursue it full-time.
My client, L., is returning to Europe after 15 years in the US development sector, and is re-looking to establish herself in a new job market, while also rebuilding a sense of home, identity, and purpose in a familiar yet changed culture.
My client, N., has just started a new senior role within an impact-driven organisation and is looking to establish her reputation within the company.
Where in your life have you recently encountered a liminal space? Or are you expecting one?
The discomfort of liminal spaces: High uncertainty.
People who had to guess whether they would receive an electric shock were more stressed than those who knew they would receive one.
Read that again.
A 2016 study showed that people who had a 50% chance of receiving a (light) electric shock were more stressed than those who knew they would be shocked 100%. (2016 study by University of London)
Uncertainty causes more stress than inevitable pain.
Our brain doesn’t like uncertainty, and so wants to move through liminal spaces as quickly as possible.
To reduce the friction, people rush things in different ways. You can see that with people rushing through airports. You can also see it with people when they decide on their future - their next physical relocation, their next job/role.
Your brain wants to reduce the friction of sitting in that space of not knowing. It’s uncomfortable because your brain craves stability and predictability. And the liminal space is anything but stable and predictable.
Recognize your coping mechanisms for reducing uncertainty
My freelance client W’s coping mechanism is the workaholic mode. W. adds more tasks to her to-do list and works longer hours to fit more in. Her coping mechanism is to fill her diary to the brim with tasks as a way to drown out the feeling of discomfort that arises when she stands still.
My leadership client N. starts micro-managing tasks and people. Instead of delegating, she analyses the data for the report. Instead of preparing for that strategy meeting, N. is focusing on tasks she knows well. Because all the new senior functions cause friction, as she is not 100% sure how to approach them.
But neither W. nor N. fall back on their coping mechanism. Because they’re in coaching with me and have the space and support to hold the tension and discomfort that the liminal space brings.
Liminal spaces are your jump-off point to your most significant and, perhaps, most fulfilling next chapter of life.
How are you handling liminal spaces? Are you clinging to the first solution rigidly (the obvious job, the first pathway), going into workaholic mode, or numbing the discomfort another way?
Whatever the coping mechanism, we often overlook the signs of emotions, fears, and beliefs that require attention and resolution. The discomfort shows you that there’s something to stretch into.
In a liminal space, it can feel like everything is possible. But just as easily… it can feel like nothing is.
That’s the paradox. One moment, you're excited by all the possibilities. Next, you're overwhelmed by them - unsure which path to trust, or whether any of them are right.
If you're rethinking your next career step, you might have a few ideas, but no clear direction (yet).
If you’re in a new leadership role, you might sense the kind of leader you want to become, but you don’t have the evidence, the muscle memory, or the confidence (yet).
In this space, anything can grow. But only if you’re willing to stay still long enough to notice what wants to emerge.
The liminal space is your learning. It’s the space where possibility and opportunity can be the seed for something new: your next move - physical or literal.
"Uncertainty is the fertile ground of pure creativity and freedom. The unknown is the field of all possibilities, ever fresh, ever new, always open to the creation of new manifestations. Without uncertainty and the unknown, life is just the stale repetition of outworn memories."
(Deepak Chopra, The seven laws of spiritual success)
5 ways to increase your tolerance for career transition uncertainty
You can train your tolerance for sitting in the liminal space.
NB: All of these five ways are good starting points. Pick the one that resonates with you the most right now and start there.
1. Recognize your signs and practice self-compassion.
Worry is of the mind. The racing thoughts, negative “what ifs”, overly vigilant negative thinking - all of these tend to be in your head. Worry is a mental attempt to reduce the unknown and feel more certain by thinking through potential outcomes.
Anxiety is in the body and comes with physical symptoms. A racing heart, sweaty palms, a surge of discomfort, shortness of breath. The physical sensations you experience are your body’s way of signalling you to pay attention to what is going on.
What are the signs that you see when you’re in the liminal space?
The first step is acknowledging your signs. The second step is to normalise it. Every human on earth has a brain that craves stability and predictability. If this is hard for you to accept, you might benefit from practising self-compassion first. You might try Dr. Neff’s 5 minute self-compassion practice on Insighttimer.
2. Enhance your ability to tolerate discomfort.
Your physical body is the container for processing your emotions, feelings and thoughts. And so, if you want to grow, working with your body to increase its capacity can be life-changing.
This might look like a punch-out practice if you feel anxiety or stress in your body (to dispel it quickly). Or a dance move if you feel low in energy or have ruminating thoughts.
Flexibility movements, mapping and releasing tension hotspots are some of the key tools I use with clients (based on my physical intelligence training)
3. See liminal space(s) as spaces for growth.
The liminal space is the space where you learn new things about yourself and the world. If it weren’t for liminal spaces, we wouldn’t grow. To be in a liminal space means to be on the precipice of something new but not quite there yet. That’s a good thing!
Keep asking yourself these questions:
What can I learn here?
What wants to show up in my experience right now?
(We know that our brain loves questions. If you ask questions, your brain goes out of its way to find the answers. They might not come immediately, but they will come. )
4. Use rituals to navigate liminal career spaces.
British anthropologist Victor Turner is known for his work on rites of passage and liminality. In his work with indigenous tribes, he demonstrated that rituals help individuals reframe their identity, integrate new roles, and feel supported during uncertain phases.
Not many of us are part of tribes or communities that hold these transitional spaces for us. But you can still mark it with rituals. Here are some ideas:
Mark the ending: Write a letter or mark a ritual to your former job, title, identity, or partner. You might burn your business cards as a symbolic gesture. Or host a farewell event with friends/family/peers.
Hold the liminal space: Use your body to integrate discomfort (see also point 2). Change locations/surroundings to refresh. Build a daily/weekly practice of journaling or reflection.
Welcome the new (even if you don’t know what yet): Find ways to engage your curiosity in a new way. Get out of your routine; give your mind something new to engage with. Celebrate the small steps you’re taking or the small progress you’re seeing. Daydream about what’s possible.
5. Seek support during the transition.
I have support around me that helps me hold the liminal space as I build my business, grow my professional identity, and navigate the uncertainty present in the world.
In all the work I read on liminal spaces, people are being held - by other people. Whether a group, a therapist or a coach. Find that person who is a step ahead of you. Get the support you need to sit in the liminal zone for that tiny bit longer.
It’s not a sign of weakness. We cannot do it all alone.
What I learned on my journey: As I improved (and I’m still learning too) at physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually holding the liminal space, my capacity increased.
Everything I’ve ever done - small or big - has come from learning to sit with the discomfort of the liminal space.
If I hadn’t explored my relationship with work and money six years ago, I wouldn’t have started this business.
If I hadn’t sat with the fear of being seen, I wouldn’t have posted my first photo on LinkedIn.
Every shift began in that discomfort of the space in between. In that space where I permitted myself to stay long enough to hear what was next.
The same is true for you.
If you want to live, lead and work with greater impact, have more confidence, bring your full potential to the table (and this life), learn to sit in the space in-between.
I’m here if you want my help. Book a free call with me here.
Book a discovery call to discuss how coaching can support you. We’ll discuss your biggest challenge, what overcoming it might look like, and whether my coaching is a good fit, all without any strings attached.
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